Friday, October 21, 2011

Weakness= Strength

We have been studying the book of Acts in BSF (Bible Study Fellowship) this year. Learning about Paul and his struggles are challenging and encouraging! I will let the Bible speak for itself. When he lists everything he has been through and then talks about his thorn and how he pleads with God 3 times to take it away God replies, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

Wow! This was so encouraging for me...especially now with day to day life. Compared to other peoples difficulties mine seem so small, but I won't guilt trip myself that way, it really doesn't make me feel any better. But God's Word does! The Holy Spirit has been revealing so much truths to me.

From 2 Corinthian 12:

"Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ’s sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

God's Word is true. His Promises are true. This I will cling to.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

Never once did I ever walk alone. Never once did You leave me on my own. You are faithful, God, You are faithful!

I've been so blessed! It has been 4 months since I've been home. And it feels like it has been longer. I think of my South African friends and Lambano almost every single day! It has been a hard journey...unfortunately one of me failing to cling to God, and turn to Him first. I knew He would take me back there if it is His plan, and ideally I would want to within a year or 2, for a longer time period.
It has been so hard, and I knew it was my heart and my attitude. The way I felt and all my emotion towards God was wrong. I felt like I couldn't pray or read His Word; to walk a daily Christian life. I think that I was angry and hurt for leaving South Africa when it felt so right living there. But I made it worse on myself for not turning to God, like if I did I would have to accept I was home when I really didn't want to. I knew I needed to, but it was the one thing I didn't want to do.
Recently the Holy Spirit has been work on me. I've repented for my attitude and asked for forgiveness from my Savior. I praise Him for His overwhelming love and patience with me while I am still on this journey, it is a working progress. I pray that it will ring in my heart that God is all I need. I don't know what the specific work is that He has for me, but I know I have to stay in it, for God is all I need! I pray that Jesus washes me over and over again for the one thing I desire is Him, God is all I need. I pray that I will no longer grieve the Holy Spirit and that His work in my life will be evident in glorifying God!
God never left me and I never walked alone or was on my own even thought it felt like it alot of the time I was ignoring Him. God is faithful and sovereign! He is in control!